Aug 29, 2011

EXPOSED AND ON DISPLAY: How I am trying to give back

As I am narrowing down things and get ready for my first public appearance event today at Crossroads Fitness in Sandy, I have been thinking a lot about the message I want to share. Everyone else has a product that they are excited to share surrounding health and fitness. Attune foods will be there showing off excellent breakfast products, Good Earth Natural Foods will be sharing how organic foods can improve your life. Everyone has a product, that is the reason they are there.

Why am I there?

When I was thinking about that, and the realization came to me that was the product, I started to panic and get very nervous. Why am I, a 360 pound man trying to be a poster child for weight loss? What am I thinking? I am going to be showing pictures of myself at my heaviest to the whole world. Yes, I have been doing this for some time here at my blog but this is going to be real life, not my internet life. There is no level of detachment and the reality of people looking at the pictures. There is no ability to delete a mean hearted comments if it goes to far like I can here. No filters no safety, real life.

Okay, now that I have given you a taste of the anxiety I face at 4 - 8pm today let me tell you why I want to do this. Simply put, it is too important not to share.

If there was something that was so powerful that it changed your entire life, your relationships with family and friends, the way you interact with people, your work..... you would want to share it right? I feel obligated to share. When I was at 524 pounds, I was desperate. Desperate to find hope for myself through someone else. Someone who wasn't doing it for a TV show, someone who didn't get weight loss surgery and someone who wasn't popping pills that would later prove to mess your body up more than it fixed it. It was not easy to find. In fact, when I started searching I could only find a few guys who where sharing their experience on line. The experiences these guys shared helped change my life forever. Knowing that there were others out there struggling with the same situation I was, and winning, gave me hope.

Who am I trying to reach? Those who have lost hope or those that think that they can not _________. I am VERY aware that I am not yet the buff dude everyone wants to look like in the Ambercrombie and Fitch adds and I have a long way to go. I am not saying "look at me I am the perfect example", I am saying "I am struggling to lose 300 pounds. If I can do this, you can do this. Let's do it together." I want people to get over unspoken stigmas and talk about weight loss. I want to help people realize the lies they tell themselves and that while genetics, metabolism, medical issues... may contribute to obesity, the biggest obstacle to losing weight is yourself. I want to help people get out of their own way and see the results that will change their lives as mine is changing.

I hope one day I can find a way to do this full time. For now, I have taken a vacation from my day job, found a sitter for the baby Badgers and put all my energies into making this event a success. If my story can help one person recommit, one person realize their potential, today will be worth it all.To a community that has shown me immeasurable support, I hope to give something back today.

P.S. I will be posting with the hashtag #crfitness today if you want to follow the play by play.


  1. Awesome! I have to share a piece of this on my blog and link back!

  2. You are an inspiration to all of us trying to lose weight! Im so glad I found your blog! It's already helped me and I've only just found it today!

    Reading posts by you and your wife have light a spark in me,
    Thank you!!